Slugs...

A slug is a peculiar creature. They are nature's ultimate slackers. When people are slow to get out of bed they are "sluggish". It is still a mystery to me where the term "slugging" comes from in reference to punching someone like Lucy threatened to do to Snoopy in the Peanuts' Christmas Special. (As a kid I didn't get it. After Snoopy was impersonating animals and then impersonating Lucy, he never once acted like a slug and punching a cartoon dog in uncharacteristic of slugs as well. Even back then, I was interested in the etymology of terms like this. I guess I was doomed to be an English major.)

Slugs always had a negative connatation in my mind. That is probably because they are mostly around when it is damp and rainy out and there are mosquitos around as well. I don't really have anything against them, though. They are really just homeless snails. Maybe the governments in snail societies should have more public programs to get slugs employed and have them find affordable shells with reasonable mortgage plans. They should also pass legislation to reduce the salting of roads in the winter to further protect those on the streets. If snails had an economic plan similar to FDR's New Deal, and Snail War II eventually got them out of the sluggish depression, then that would be really awesome.

Monday Morning Peyton: Priceless

Peyton Manning just missed an opportunity of a lifetime. He had the chance to cross the threshold that separates Hall of Fame caliber quarterbacks. There are those quarterbacks who hold all the major records, people like Brett Favre and Dan Marino, and there are those who win multiple championships, people like Otto Graham, Bart Starr, Roger Staubach, Tom Brady, Terry Bradshaw, Troy Aikman, John Elway, and Joe Montana, and Peyton Manning had the chance to be both. Drew Brees and the New Orleans Saints had different ideas though.

Don't worry, I'm not just talking about football. If that does not interest you, I will also be discussing the halftime show and the commercials.

It was great to see Drew Brees, the Saints QB who is five inches shorter than his Indianapolis counterpart and has spent most of his career overshadowed by other talent around the NFL. It was great to see the city of New Orleans with something to cheer about. After Hurricane Katrina and forty-four mostly forgettable years of Saints football, there is finally something to celebrate on Bourbon Street before Mardi Gras. Manning had a great season, one of the best in history, but his only critical mistake was in the biggest game of the year at the most crucial time. Tracey Porter's interception showed the world that even Peyton Manning, the four time MVP, considered by many to be the greatest QB in football history, is human.

Now, back to the other stuff.

The Who in the halftime show:

I know that they have been trying to get older musicians because they are more tame and family friendly ever since the Janet Jackson incident, but this is starting to get bad. Sixty-Five year old men should not be the headline event in the halftime show. Since Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake in 2004, they have had Paul McCartney (pretty good), The Rolling Stones (pretty bad), Prince (can't remember), Tom Petty (the Pats were in the Super Bowl so I ate during halftime and didn't see it), Bruce Springsteen (awesome), and The Who last night. For the most part, these older guys can't really bring a whole lot of excitement to the event especially when the games themselves this past decade have been better than usual. A lot of the people who listen to classic rock will be watching the game anyway. The NFL could appeal to a larger audience if they got more relevant musicians. They had an Arcade Fire song in the NFL Network commercials last night. I think Arcade Fire would be a really cool halftime show. The Who came across as old and tired. Their best concerts are a few decades behind them. It is time for something new.

Commercials:

I really liked the McDonalds commercial with Lebron James and Dwight Howard. The best part was when Larry Bird came in at the end. It was a great tribute to a classic commercial that starred Larry Bird and Michael Jordan. I had no idea that today's NBA stars were too ignorant to know who Larry Legend is. It's a shame.

The Budweiser human bridge commercial was great. They always do good work on Super Bowl Sunday. The Bud Light ads on the desert island and the asteroid lab were also funny.

It was great to see the Griswolds going on vacation again.

The Super Bowl shuffle remake was a bit of a disappointment. It just isn't the same without Walter Payton and Mike Singletary. Ditka's cameo was good but they, like The Who, just looked old and tired.

The Etrade babies are starting to get boring.

The commercial that really bothered me was the ad for the Late Show with Dave Letterman. It just seemed forced and awkward (I get that that is what they were going for but it didn't make me want to watch the show) to see Leno and Letterman on the same couch with Oprah keeping the peace. It didn't help either of them. I do not understand why Jay Leno agreed to be in the commercial. Oprah seemed like the only one who has any sense of empathy or humanity anymore. Clearly, these two old talk show hosts only care about themselves and "their" network rivalry. They think that everything is about them just because of the Tonight Show replacement controversy 17 years ago. It is unfortunate that a classy guy like Conan O'Brien is off the air and America still has to see these tired old timers battling it out for a few more years. What do I know? I guess I am not the typical viewer seeing as all my favorite shows are on 4th place NBC.

All in all, Super Bowl XLIV was a good night of football surrounded by an okay night of ads and a bad night of music. It will be interesting to see what the next Super Bowl will bring.

Has Family Guy Jumped the Shark?

For years Family Guy has been a staple of Fox Network's "Animation Domination" lineup along with The Simpsons and King of the Hill. In recent years, with the addition of American Dad! to the lineup and more recently the addition of The Cleveland Show to Fox's Sunday night programming, Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane has truly dominated "Animation Domination" time slot wise. The Simpsons now remains as the only show on the network on that night that was not created by MacFarlane. To me, it has become apparent as Matt Groening's Simpsons celebrate their twentieth anniversary on the air, that they still have what it takes to make people laugh. How much longer can Peter Griffin keep making us laugh before enough is enough and the eventual decline in ratings followed by cancellation?

Family Guy had a good run. That run may continue, but I have a feeling that the show has reached the point where it will not get any better than it was before. I realize that cartoon shows rely on ridiculous story lines but since the second half of last season, Family Guy has gone off the deep end. It is starting to show signs of running low on new ideas. Let's see, first Joe's wife Bonnie finally gives birth after being pregnant for the show's entire run. It would have been clever if the developed the newborn Susie Swanson into a new character as a talking foil to Stewie, but that has not happened yet. They had Cleveland move to Virginia and start his own show. The Cleveland Show is a dull, unoriginal rehash of The Brady Bunch with elements of Family Guy only with the spotlight on Peter's slow talking sidekick and it also leaves a void back in Quahog. In an attempt to make things interesting, they had Chevy Chase and Dan Aykroyd move into Cleveland's old house and it turns out that they are spies for the U.S. government but even that did not live up to Family Guy's former glory. Other recent crazy plots include Lois finding out that she is actually Jewish, Peter being injected with the gay gene, and Peter developing amnesia and having to relearn everything, including "Surfing Bird". Perhaps the worst change made recently to the show is Quagmire's sudden development of moral fiber. All of a sudden, he volunteers in soup kitchens and chews Brian out for his intellectual phoniness. Brian had always been the voice of reason on the show, but it was Quagmire, of all people, who tarnished Brian's integrity as a character.

In the most recent episode, Meg exacts revenge on the world. After years of being pushed around by her parents, her dog, and her classmates, Meg goes to jail for three months for harboring an escaped convict that she fell in love with through a school pen pal program. Prison hardens her, she curb stomps Peter and get's suspended for breaking her class mates skulls. Before she is able to rob a drug store and leave town, Brian reminds her that he used to care about her and that she doesn't have to live her life like this. And just like that, she goes back to normal. This puts the show's future in a tough situation. If the characters keep ragging on Meg like they have since the show began, nothing will ever happen because she has already snapped. They can't have her snap again and it still be quality entertainment. If they treat Meg with more respect, a big part of the humor on the show will be lost.

Part of the problem Family Guy has is its desire to be better than The Simpsons. No matter how long either of those shows last, they will always be compared to one another. For Family Guy, that is a fight that you will never win. The Simpsons have been on television for twenty years now and they have been consistently good. The key to their success has been character development in both quality and quantity. While Family Guy has maybe twenty regularly occurring characters, The Simpsons has a whole town of identifiable characters. Besides the Simpson family, there is Moe the bartender, Principal Skinner, Comic Book Guy, Ned Flanders, Mr. Burns, Smithers, Reverend Lovejoy, Groundskeeper Willie, Krusty the Clown, Sideshow Bob, Sideshow Mel, Apu, Ralph Wiggum, Milhouse, Nelson, Lenny, Carl, Barney, and many many more. Some fans may say they The Simpsons is not as good as it used to be, but it still provides quality laughs and social commentary. It also has not had to rely on irrelevant pop culture references and grown men falling out of bathtubs over and over again to get people to laugh.

Only time will tell if Family Guy has peaked or if The Simpsons will ever truly plummet in quality but based on my observations, I have a feeling that Family Guy has lost a step in the game that is television. If Meg snaps again or if I hear "Surfing Bird" again, I will know that it's over.